Social work: How giving to others can give us more

I had moved to the US three years ago to pursue a career as a writer. I got accepted to my dream school in Syracuse, started working as a journalist in New York City, and learned to forge my way forward slowly but steadily in a new country. I thought I had everything I desired, until I stumbled upon the idea of doing social work.

During my internship at Time Out, I came across an article for the best places to volunteer in NYC and learnt about The Bowery Mission. The idea grew stronger in my mind when I got my first job as an assistant editor in the city. New York had given me my purpose in life, shaped me into a hardworking individual, and challenged me to demand more from life. I felt a deep urge to contribute my bit to the city.

1. You’ll learn to step outside your comfort zone

The Bowery Mission has been around since 1879 in Lower East Side in New York. Through meals, shelters, medical aid, and mentoring programs—the mission reaches out to communities in Harlem and South Bronx—giving struggling New Yorkers hope.

The mission’s programs reach out to children in the neighborhood primarily through its Mont Lawn City Camp (MLCC) initiative. With many schools cutting-off funding for the arts—MLCC’s efforts to train at-risk youth through workshops in music, creative writing, painting, chess, cookery, and sports is commendable.

Last fall, I applied to MLCC to help teach kids. After a thorough interview, I was appointed as one of the volunteers to help assist and then lead art and creative writing workshops. I felt excited and afraid at the same time—could I really do justice to the job? Teaching kids to draw and write was easy, but teaching them life skills through art was the challenge. However, that’s the beauty of social work, it inspires people to step outside their comfort zone and do more.

2. Stretching your imagination to problem solve is key

In the next 10 months, I taught kids positive thinking, team building, and taking initiative in their community through workshops in art. In helping children imagine a bright future full of possibilities—I was training young minds to see a silver lining in the darkest of clouds. However, in being their guide, I had to train my mind to see the light first.

I used art as a canvas to challenge the limitations that some of these kids might face in real life. One day, I cut circular holes through rectangular sheets of paper that I handed out to 6- to 9-year-olds. Then I asked them to make a drawing in the remaining part of the paper. Using their imagination, I challenged my students to use the hole as a central part of their painting.

By the end of the class, the holes in the blank sheets had transformed into colorful balloons, wings of a butterfly, one-half of a heart, the petal of a flower, and wheels of a school bus. My students had successfully turned the problem on its head, using it to empower their perspective.

To see smiles of accomplishment on the faces of children that trust you unconditionally is a priceless feeling. I understood that day, that the kids I’ll teach will not benefit as much from me—as I from them.

3. To make a difference in someone’s life is empowering

I had carved out Friday evenings for my work with the kids. This meant finishing off my other assignments ahead of time. Weekend blues set in early on Friday afternoons—tormenting me to break free from my work commitments and unwind. That’s just when I was rushing to catch the 6 to Harlem. But, remaining committed to what I had signed-up for, was key.

No matter, how busy my days got, the kids I taught and the time I spent with them were beginning to take center-stage in my life. Getting a drink with friends after office hours or binge-watching Netflix through the weekend seemed a waste—when I could use my time making a difference in a child’s life. I also felt happier, refreshed, and more driven toward my own life goals.

As a foreigner, interacting and teaching kids from the States helped me understand this country and her people better. Kids—through the books they read, the cartoons they watch, the questions they ask, and the expressions they make—taught me more about the culture, dreams, and sentiments of Americans.

4. Students can be a teacher’s best guide

I soon came to realize that teaching children was no cakewalk. It required the ability to break complex thoughts into simple nuggets that could engage 6-year-olds.

Teaching teenagers demanded a different skill set. I had to treat 16-year-olds as young adults who had the right to express their opinion and be confident in their skin. I had to learn that there is no wrong or right way of doing things, and that sometimes I need to give space to students to figure out their own way.

During this time, I remembered my schoolteachers and my respect for them multiplied manifold. Remembering my years spent growing up in India, and relating it to experiences of kids in another country, made me appreciate that human beings are the same the world over.

Teaching, for me was not an overnight process. I had to think of art projects ahead of time, write out the curriculum in detail, and make sure they helped empower my students.

Sometimes despite my best efforts, I didn’t get the results I desired. It felt a lot like I was planting seeds, which take many years and constant care to grow into healthy trees. This helped me develop healthy patience toward other things in my life.

5. Why it’s free and why that’s important

If I got paid for this work, I’d measure its worth in monetary terms. In our world, we’ve learnt to equate the value of anything we buy, wear, and do in terms of money. In taking money away from the equation—especially while volunteering to teach kids out of the goodness of the act—is an important factor.

Through social work what I was really trying to do is build a human relationship and that cannot be quantified. Think of your relationship with your mom. Can you say it’s worth any number of dollars? Doesn’t the thought of money stacked against someone you love wholeheartedly, reduce the relationship—making it feel cheap?

However, I did earn something invaluable. I earned a restful sleep, I began to smile more, and I won a purple heart. Yes, my student drew one for me as a parting gift. She filled it with her favorite color purple and wrote my name on top of the paper: “Dear Ms. V, this is for you.”

6. Kids will help you see the world with new eyes

It sounds like a cliché but it’s true. Kids have a way of processing reality that is simple, brutally honest, and downright fearless. And spending time with them will leave adults refreshed with childlike wisdom.

One day, we had to take the kids to Prospect Park for ice-skating. We were all excited. Many of the kids and I were going to ice-skate for the first time. All the kids put on their skates and helmets and entered the ring, smiles glaring. I did the same, but held onto the railing with dear life.

I just couldn’t enter the ring without holding onto someone cause I was sure I was going to fall. And when one of my students showed me how to work my feet, I managed to do it with one hand still firmly fixed on the fence.

Just then one of the kids fell flat on his face and got a nosebleed. We took him aside and gave him first aid treatment. Surprisingly, he looked like he was more in hurry than in pain. “Can I please go back?” he protested.

Once we were sure that he didn’t have any major injury, we let him put his skates back on. I saw him take off with more purpose in his strides. Later on he told me, “You’ve gotta fall at least once Ms. V. Otherwise you’ll never get over it.”

He was right. As we grow older, we become more wary of failure. We start judging others and ourselves for not figuring something out in the first go. Our attitude holds us back from testing life’s true potential.

7. You’ll make friends for life and find a family

Living and working in another country had transformed me into an independent woman. However, I missed home during Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years Eve when families gather together to celebrate. It was my dream to connect with people and get to know them better.

Doing social work granted me my wish. I not only got a chance to interact with kids and their parents, I also learnt plenty from other volunteers and teachers at the program. I was welcomed with open arms and given a platform to creatively express my ideas. In many ways I started looking at my fellow social workers as my own family.

My need to do voluntary work had sprung from the love I felt for New York City. To tell you the truth, the city had given to me once again. After a long time away from home, I had found home—a place that made me truly happy.