Top 3 reasons women cheat
When it comes to infidelity, men and women are motivated by different reasons, goals and expectations. Women tend stray from a faithful relationship with the hope for a better relationship, whereas many men who cheat describe their current relationship as happy.
There are many reasons for infidelity including revenge, excitement sexual novelty, sexual addiction or just plain boredom. Many experts say that often, motivations differ by gender, with men looking for more sex or attention and women wanting to fill an emotional void.
Cheating has been part of the human condition as long as the concept of monogamy has existed. Many people believe that for men, the drive is purely a biological need to procreate with as many partners as possible, although there are many men who remain faithful. The idea that adultery is “natural” for men has been around a long time. It’s a theory that is hard to prove or disprove. Some experts are starting to wonder if the connection women look for when having affairs may have evolutionary roots as well.
Of course, every relationship is different and we can’t apply behavioral motivation across an entire gender, but we can consider what women have said their reasons for infidelity. Here are the top three things women who have had affairs said they were looking for.
The Need for an Emotional Connection:
By far and away the number one reason women say they look outside a relationship is for an emotional bond they no longer feel with their partner. Rutgers University biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, author of Why Him? Why Her? says women tend to have an emotional connection with their lover and are more likely to have an affair because of loneliness.
A study published in the journal Sex Roles in 2011 found that for women, cheating is more often a way to get out of an unsatisfying relationship and into another.
Excitement:
Many women cite boredom or the feeling that their relationship has become routine and stale as the reason they stray. Nothing is more seductive than the lure of something shiny and new. “Dylan Selterman, Ph.D., a psychology professor at the University of Maryland, says “Passion ebbs as once-exciting things become routine. Lack of novelty is strongly linked to dissatisfaction.”
Revenge:
Whoever coined the phrase Hell hath no fury like that of a woman scorned knew what he or she was talking about. A surprising number of women who cheat say it was to give their partner a taste of his own medicine. While that may be a handy justification, revenge does seem to be a motivating factor in at least providing an excuse to take action on something she may have already been thinking about.
There are clearly many more reasons why a woman may decide to be unfaithful and often the decision is based on a combination of factors. The more we try to understand the causes of infidelity the greater the chances we can prevent it.